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Showing posts with label humility. Show all posts
Showing posts with label humility. Show all posts

Sunday, 31 August 2025

Those who humble themselves will be exalted

Here's the sermon that I have shared at St Mary's Runwell and St Peter's Nevendon today: 

One of the things I did during my holiday was to watch a film about the life of the guitarist and rock star Eric Clapton. In part, this was because he experienced a conversion to Christ, about which he has written in some of his songs.

Clapton knew significant trauma in his life being brought up by his grandparents as his mother was unable to look after him as a child and did not bond with him later in life. Additionally, later in life, his four-year-old son, Conor, died in a tragic accident when he fell from a window in a high-rise apartment. The film was particularly interesting because of a radical difference in the way he responded to the painful issues he experienced in his life in his early and later years.

Clapton found fame, wealth and adulation as a young man because of his musical talents but finding those things, when combined with his early traumas did not bring joy and contentment. Instead, they led him into drug and alcohol addition which was focused on his own desires, needs and wants, including desiring a relationship with Patti Boyd, the wife of his best friend, the Beatle George Harrison. Once out of control, through excessive drinking, he also found himself making racist statements on stage that he later regretted because his career was actually based on discovering the blues, the music of Black America.

So, his selfish and self-centred behaviours, which derived in part from early experiences of pain and hurt as a child, had the effect of destroying his and other’s relationships while leading him to say and do many things that, when sober, he regretted. At a key moment in his attempts to kick his addictions, he cried out to God for help and felt that he was answered. Getting sober and finding faith meant that when the rebuilding of a new life was rocked by the tragic death of his young son, he didn’t revert to his former absorption in drink and drugs instead he committed to living in a way that honoured his son. The film ended with Clapton as a happy family man who has set up a charity providing support to those who could not otherwise afford the help needed to get free of their own addictions and using his talents and those of his friends to raise funds to support that vital work.

Our Gospel reading today (Luke 14: 1, 7-14) sets up similar contrasts to those we find in the life of Eric Clapton. The context is a party, something that would have been very familiar to Clapton in his hedonistic days, and the question Jesus poses is how should we enter. In his early years, Clapton would have become familiar with being the star, the one who turned heads when he walked in the room, and would have become used, as a result, to being given all he wanted and desired, even if it did him harm.

Jesus commends the reverse of entering as the star. He encourages us to be the one who takes the last and lowest place at the table. One of the problems, as Clapton discovered, with being at the head of the table is that the only way from there, at some stage, is down. But, as Jesus notes, if you are in the last and lowest place, the only way is up. Jesus is famous for prophesying that, in the final reckoning, the first shall be last and the last first. This is a part of what Clapton discovered in later life as he changes from a life centred on his own needs and wants to one centred on others – his family and those seeking to be free from addictions.

His understanding of this change shows up in his songs, particularly a song called ‘Broken Hearted’, where, in the context of looking forward to heaven, he writes:

‘there's a place where we can go
Where we will not be parted
And who alone will enter there?
Only the broken-hearted’

We live in a world where leaders are increasingly focused on self-promotion – constantly creating narratives about how wonderful they are and how awful their predecessors were – and are advocating policies based on selfishness, particularly by blaming the problems faced by nations on those who have or are migrating from issues and situations most of us can’t imagine and couldn’t cope with. Placing the blame for the issues we face on those travelling to different countries ignores all the other problems our countries face and seeks to portray those who are actually victims of violence or oppressions as invaders. The inherent selfishness that is at the heart of such policies is that of saying we must keep all our resources for those that we see as being the same as ourselves instead of being willing to share – ‘sharing is caring’, as my grandchildren are rightly taught at their school.

How should we respond to our changing and self-centred world, as those who are told by Jesus to take the last and lowest place at the table? The answer is to be found in today’s Epistle (Hebrews 13: 1-8, 15-16):

‘Let mutual love continue. Do not neglect to show hospitality to strangers, for by doing that some have entertained angels without knowing it. Remember those who are in prison, as though you were in prison with them; those who are being tortured, as though you yourselves were being tortured. Let marriage be held in honour by all, and let the marriage bed be kept undefiled; for God will judge fornicators and adulterers. Keep your lives free from the love of money, and be content with what you have; for he has said, ‘I will never leave you or forsake you.’

Christian love – taking the last or lowest place - involves showing hospitality to strangers, remembering those who are in most difficulty or distress as though we are experiencing the same ourselves, being faithful to those closest to us, and living contentedly with what we have, not chasing after material wealth, in order that we trust God for his presence which means more than all we might otherwise gain.

Jesus is clear that those who live self-centred lives are on the wrong path, as all who exalt themselves will be humbled. As we have seen from the story of Eric Clapton’s life that is also what he discovered as he came to see it was a path of destruction, both for himself and for those around him. He wrote in his autobiography: ‘From that day until this, I have never failed to pray in the morning, on my knees, asking for help, and at night, to express gratitude for life, and most of all, for my sobriety. I choose to kneel because I feel I need to humble myself when I pray, and with my ego, this is the most I can do.’

Each of us, however, has to come to that realisation for ourselves, if we are as individuals or as nations are to change tack and, as Clapton also did, learn the lesson of Jesus’ parable and the value in God’s eyes of taking the last or lowest place. All who exalt themselves will be humbled, and those who humble themselves will be exalted. May it be so for each one of us. Amen.

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Eric Clapton - Broken Hearted.

Tuesday, 25 February 2025

Bill Fay R.I.P.

Dead Oceans recently announced the passing of Bill Fay, who died peacefully in London, aged 81.

They wrote: "Bill was a gentle man and a gentleman, wise beyond our times. He was a private person with the biggest of hearts, who wrote immensely moving, meaningful songs that will continue to find people for years to come.Bill’s first two albums, Bill Fay and Time of the Last Persecution, found a modest but loving audience upon their release at the dawn of the 1970s. While they weren’t considered commercial successes at the time, they continue to inspire devotion decades on, now known as overlooked classics from the era.

With enormous help from producer Joshua Henry, who tracked Bill down and convinced him to make another album, Bill later went on to make three more albums with Dead Oceans: Life is People (2012), his first release for forty years; Who is the Sender? (2015); and Countless Branches (2020), enjoying his cult status in real time.

Only a month before his passing, Bill was busy working on a new album. Our hope is to find a way to finish and release it, but for now, we remember Bill’s legacy as the “man in the corner of the room at the piano”, who quietly wrote heartfelt songs that touched and connected with people around the world."

'Bill Fay Was a Hidden Gem. One Musician Made Finding Him a Mission.' was the New York Times headline for an article exploring the background to Fay's album 'Countless Branches.'

Bill Fay made two albums at the beginning of the 1970s before losing his contract and disappearing from the scene. The strength of these albums, particularly the second 'Time of the Last Persecution,' led several musicians and producers to find Fay and assist in releasing more of his music.

Fay’s first two albums since his rediscovery, “Life Is People” in 2012 and “Who Is the Sender?” in 2015, were both profitable and effective follow-ups to the records he’d made 40 years earlier resulting in the recording of the most recent 'Countless Branches.'

Grayson Haver Currin notes that Fay's: 'self-titled 1970 debut featured idealistic odes to friendship, nature and peace swaddled in swooping strings and cascading horns. But only a year later, he’d turned to thorny rock for “Time of the Last Persecution.” Fueled by the horrors of the Vietnam War and the violence of the Jim Crow South, Fay railed against social corruption for 14 fractured songs, framing life as a revolving door of chances to get right with God.'

With the more recent albums Fay is: 'still writing about his distrust of governments and his belief in the goodness of people. Henry smartly dressed those songs in chamber-pop elegance. Tweedy lent his voice to a jangling tune called “This World,” while Spiritualized’s Jason Pierce added subtle harmonies to “Bring It On Lord,” a paean to valuing the days you have left. Fay’s voice wavered and rasped with age, the seams worn like proud wrinkles of wisdom.'

A Bill Fay song is often a 'deceptively simple thing, which carries more emotional weight than its concision and brevity might imply.' They are musical haikus on 'his recurring themes: nature, the family of man, the cycle of life and the ineffable vastness of it all.' The most recent releases being 'as pointed and as poignant as anything he’s ever recorded, as if songs waiting for their time have finally found their rightful place within our current zeitgeist.'

Bill Fay - Countless Branches - 'Countless Branches is the third of Fay's later-period albums, following Life Is People (2012) and Who Is the Sender? (2015). It might just be the best, too. It's palatable and concise, comprising ten tracks with bonuses pushing the total to 17. An incorrigible grouch might bridle at these guileless, gently philosophical songs, but they're delivered with such obvious sincerity that the rest of us will be charmed. As ever, Fay focuses on the search for meaning and substance in everyday life.'

Bill Fay's 'beautifully hymnal fourth studio album' Who is the Sender? 'contains sublime, heartfelt ruminations on nature and the world.' With less light and shade than Life is People but with a more consistently meditative tone, With profound simplicity, like that of Chance in Being There, Fay mourns the inhumanity of our warlike impulses while prayerfully calling for a new world to be manifest.

The song 'Who Is The Sender?' on Bill Fay's album of the same title is about the phenomenon which Fay sees as 'songfinding' rather than songwriting:

'Ask Bill Fay about his relationship with his instrument and he says something revealing, not "Ever since I learnt to play the piano", but "Ever since the piano taught me..."

What the piano taught him was how to connect to one of the great joys of his life. "Music gives," he says. And he is a grateful receiver. But, it makes him wonder, "Who is the sender?" ...

joy and sadness are indeed deep in this material, which Bill describes as "alternative gospel". Though it clearly stems from his belief, he doesn't seek to proselytise or convert anybody, but just hopes to share the concerns he puts into the words and the feelings that he receives from the music:

"Goodness, beauty, comfort. If something gives in the world, that's a good thing, isn't it? Maybe that's what music wants to do."'

Bill Fay’s songs on Life is People are simply astonishing - simple and melodic yet with unusual imagery and insights delivered with gravity and grace. 'Cosmic Concerto (Life Is People)' is a highlight from a collection of stand-out tracks; a celebration of the miracle of ordinary life, the infinite variation in each human face, which stirs his soul.

'Aside from Fay's plaintive cover of Wilco's Jesus Etc, Life Is People also continues with the lyrical themes established back in 1969-70 ... "They need space to convey," he stresses, "but, in a simple way, biblical prophecy. Not in some extreme or fanatical way but fundamentally, that this world - in the hands of different leaders, competing with each other economically - it can't carry on. It's belief in a change. There's comfort in that. I'm not so sure how you could handle the world if you didn't have that. It's God's world, yet we walk around as if it's ours."' (Mojo)

Bill Fay's Life Is People is an album to treasure produced by a man of real humility with a wonderful back story. The story is as follows:

"Bill Fay was born in North London, where he still lives. His debut on the underground Decca Nova label, Bill Fay (1970), included spacious big band jazz arrangements by Mike Gibbs, but it was the follow-up, Time Of The Last Persecution (1971), that cemented his reputation — a harrowing, philosophical and painfully honest diagnosis of an unhealthy society and a messed-up planet, that featured the cream of London's fieriest jazz session players such as guitarist Ray Russell. Unable to make ends meet as a musician, Fay wandered through a succession of jobs for years, writing songs privately. His albums were reissued in 1998 after being deleted for 27 years, and when the likes of Jeff Tweedy and David Tibet (Current 93) began singing his praises in the early 2000s, Bill began to come back into view. A third album, recorded piecemeal in the late 70s, was released in 2005 as Tomorrow Tomorrow And Tomorrow, by The Bill Fay Group. And Wilco even convinced the shy singer to join them onstage in London in 2007.

A CD of Bill's early demos and home recordings has also since emerged, but Life Is People is his first properly crafted studio album since 1971. He was motivated by American producer Joshua Henry, a fan who had grown up listening to the Bill Fay albums in his Dad's record collection. Spooling through Bill's home demos, Joshua discovered an incredible trove of material and decided to do something about it. Guitarist Matt Deighton (Oasis, Paul Weller, Mother Earth) assembled a cast of backup musicians to bring out the songs' full potential, Tim Weller (who's played drums for everyone from Will Young to Noel Gallagher and Goldfrapp), and keyboardist Mikey Rowe (High Flying Birds, Stevie Nicks, etc). In addition, Bill is reunited on several tracks with Ray Russell and drummer Alan Rushton, who played on Time Of The Last Persecution."

Fay's humility seems to run throughout this project - in his low-key, almost hestitant delivery, in lyrics such as "The never ending happening / Of what's to be and what has been / Just to be a part of it / Is astonishing to me" ('The Never Ending Happening')) and "I don't ask much, for myself / But for the one's I love" ('Thank You Lord'), and in liner notes which simply express profound gratitude for the support he has received from others in the making of this album.

His songs are simply astonishing - simple and melodic yet with unusual imagery and insights delivered with gravity and grace:

"Ranging from intimate to cosmic, epic but never grandiose, Bill's deeply committed music reminds you of important, eternal truths, and the lessons to be drawn from the natural world, when the materiality and greed threaten to engulf everything.

From the Eden-like hope for a better world in the opening "There Is A Valley" to the street sweeper gazing past the neon lights to the heavens in "City Of Dreams"; from the grand historical sweep of "Big Painter" to the compassionate hopefulness of "The Healing Day"; Bill's perceptive songs strike at the heart of the big issues facing us all today. But they're humble and down to earth too, full of striking images: witness the panoramic "Cosmic Concerto (Life Is People)", with its windblown seeds and grandmas blowing kisses into prams: as rapturous and soul-stirring as any music you'll hear this year."

'Cosmic Concerto (Life Is People)' is a highlight from a collection of stand-out tracks; a celebration of the miracle of ordinary life, the infinite variation in each human face, which stirs his soul. This is music to stir the soul, as Jim O'Rourke has stated "Bill Fay has quietly held his head high above the fray of chaos for years with the beauty of his music and the power of his spirit."

Bill Fay's classic Time Of The Last Persecution displays empathy in the face of apocalypse. Fay's songs are simply astonishing - simple and melodic yet with unusual imagery and insights (both whimsical and surreal bearing comparison with Syd Barrett and Nick Drake) delivered with gravity and grace.

Bill Fay was profoundly influenced by Teilhard de Chardin:

"Shortly after his debut was released, Fay stumbled across an old biblical commentary and quickly developed a fascination with the books of Daniel and Revelation. With the Vietnam War still escalating and the Kent State massacres in the headlines, the dark, apocalyptic tone of the ancient prophetic literature seemed disturbingly relevant. About this same time, Fay also began reading the writings of Pierre Teilhard de Chardin, a mid-twentieth century Jesuit, scientist, and philosopher, who believed that all of reality, both human and non-human, is rapidly evolving toward an eternal state of unity and peace. The earth’s present travails (war, poverty, injustice), however overwhelming they may seem, are really the birth pangs of the coming paradise—evidence of both the deficiencies of our current existence and the imminence of the world to come.

Armed with these new intellectual resources, Fay fashioned a second recording that was darker and more desperate but ultimately more hopeful than the first. Time of the Last Persecution is dominated by Fay’s vision of the coming apocalypse, vividly described in songs like “’Til the Christ Come Back,” “Plan D,” and the bleak, bombastic title cut. Fay’s eschatology on the recording is a far cry from the Us-vs.-Them cynicism of religious orthodoxy, in which the chosen people are eternally rewarded while the rest of us are cast into a bottomless lake of fire. For Fay, as for Teilhard before him, deliverance is deliverance for all (hippie and soldier, young and old, human and non-human) from the structures and institutions that oppress and alienate us. And the coming of the messiah signifies that all of reality—however senseless it may now seem—ultimately has value and significance. “The album was a commitment,” Fay recently explained, “albeit a reluctant one at first, to the belief that there will be, and has to be at some point, some spiritual intervention in the world.”'

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Bill Fay - Thank You Lord.

Monday, 12 June 2023

ArtWay - Rouault and Girard: Crucifixion and Resurrection, Penitence and Life Anew

The Artist as Truth-Teller and the Legacy of French Artist Georges Rouault was an Association of Scholars of Christianity in the History of Art symposium at Institut Catholique de Paris in 2022 in honour of the 150th anniversary of the birth of French modernist Georges Rouault.

I gave a paper at the symposium entitled ‘True humility is not mediocrity’ in which I explored the influence of Rouault on the life and work of André Girard. I discovered the work of Girard through Christianity in Art by Frank and Dorothy Getlein, a book which views Rouault as being ‘the twentieth century artist above all others who fused into one monumental testament all the elements of the social revolution and the new Christianity.’ Girard, as student and friend of Rouault, was seen by the Getlein’s as developing “the first move of Christian art toward the universal audience of today.”

Although he enjoyed considerable recognition in his own day and time, the reputation of Girard has diminished with time, unlike that of Rouault. As a result, his work is ripe for rediscovery. In this paper, in addition to highlighting key strands of Rouault’s influence on Girard such as humility and risk taking, I explored some of the reasons why Rouault’s work transcends his age, while that of Girard seems to remain within his. Additionally, I shared the contrasts in their work noted by their friend André Suares - penitence and affirmation.

This paper has now been published by ArtWay as their latest Blog post:

'when we combine the work of the teacher with that of his student, we encounter the full Gospel in depictions both of the dying world into which Christ comes and the abundance of life that is found in and through him as he brings a new world into being, just as Girard, in the words of Suarés brings a new art into being.'

For more on the ASCHA symposium, click here. My poem based on this paper entitled 'The twin poles of Rouault and Girard' has been published by Stride, while a related poem, 'Maritain, Green, Beckett and Anderson in conversation down through the ages', is in Amethyst Review. For more on Rouault, click here.

My visual meditations for ArtWay include work by María Inés Aguirre, Giampaolo Babetto, Marian Bohusz-Szyszko, Alexander de Cadenet, Christopher Clack, Marlene Dumas, Terry Ffyffe, Jake Flood, Antoni Gaudi, Nicola Green, Maciej Hoffman, Lakwena Maciver, S. Billie Mandle, Giacomo Manzù, Sidney Nolan, Michael Pendry, Maurice Novarina, Regan O'Callaghan, Ana Maria Pacheco, John Piper, Nicola Ravenscroft, Albert Servaes, Henry Shelton, Anna Sikorska, Alan Stewart, Jan Toorop, Andrew VesseyEdmund de Waal and Sane Wadu.

My Church of the Month reports include: All Saints Parish Church, Tudeley, Aylesford Priory, Canterbury Cathedral, Chapel of St. Thérèse of the Child Jesus and the Holy Face, Hem, Chelmsford Cathedral, Churches in Little Walsingham, Coventry Cathedral, Église de Saint-Paul à Grange-Canal, Eton College Chapel, Lumen, Metz Cathedral, Notre Dame du Léman, Notre-Dame de Toute Grâce, Plateau d’Assy,Romont, Sint Martinuskerk Latem, St Aidan of Lindisfarne, St Alban Romford, St. Andrew Bobola Polish RC Church, St. Margaret’s Church, Ditchling, and Ditchling Museum of Art + Craft, St Mary the Virgin, Downe, St Michael and All Angels Berwick and St Paul Goodmayes, as well as earlier reports of visits to sites associated with Marian Bohusz-Szyszko, Marc Chagall, Jean Cocteau, Antoni Gaudi and Henri Matisse.

Blogs for ArtWay include: Congruity and controversy: exploring issues for contemporary commissionsErvin Bossanyi: A vision for unity and harmony;
Photographing Religious Practice; Spirituality and/in Modern Art; and The Spirituality of the Artist-Clown.

Interviews for ArtWay include: Sophie Hacker, Peter Koenig and Belinda Scarlett. I also interviewed ArtWay founder Marleen Hengelaar Rookmaaker for Artlyst.

I have reviewed: Art and the Church: A Fractious Embrace, Kempe: The Life, Art and Legacy of Charles Eamer Kempe and Jazz, Blues, and Spirituals.

Other of my writings for ArtWay can be found here. My pieces for Church Times can be found here. Those for Artlyst are here and those for Art+Christianity are here

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Ricky Ross - When Sinners Fall.

Sunday, 30 April 2023

Artlyst: Sean Scully - A Humility Towards Nature

My latest interview for Artlyst is with Sean Scully and includes mention of his current exhibition at Houghton Hall:

'Becoming more deeply connected to nature has only enhanced the sense of humility that is to be found in the title of his Houghton Hall exhibition – ‘Smaller Than The Sky’ – as “nature makes you humble and happy because you’re part of something bigger.” The key to a more paradisal relationship with nature is to remove the transactional or profit-based element, whether financial or salvific. The key, as with his friendship with Kelly Grovier and the writings of Donald Kuspit, is that we don’t act or create in order to get something back.'

See here for my article on Sean Scully's 'The 12 / Dark Windows'.

My other pieces for Artlyst are:

Interviews -
Monthly diary articles -
Articles/Reviews -
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To Kill A King - World Of Joy (A List Of Things To Do).

Saturday, 31 August 2019

A prayer from St Martin-in-the-Fields


"Look with grace upon this country.
Bring wisdom in the face of haste
and humility in the context of dispute"

A prayer from St Martin-in-the-Fields reflecting the widespread concern over the nation’s political and constitutional situation.

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Taize - O, Lord Hear My Prayer.

Saturday, 3 November 2018

ArtWay meditation: NIcola Green

In my latest Visual Meditation for ArtWay I reflect on the faceless portraits of global religious leaders by Nicola Green which can currently be seen at St Martin-in-the-Fields:

'Green has noted that all the religious leaders she has met share the feeling that no one takes much notice of them. Maybe her faceless portraits reflect this sense that they are overlooked and ignored. Many religions, however, encourage adherents to nurture humility in response to the divine. C.S. Lewis wrote that the humble are not thinking about humility, rather they are not thinking about themselves at all. It could be that Green’s religious leaders exemplify this understanding and that her faceless depictions reflect this.'

My other ArtWay meditations include work by María Inés Aguirre, Giampaolo Babetto, Marian Bohusz-Szyszko, Alexander de CadenetChristopher Clack, Marlene Dumas, Terry Ffyffe, Antoni Gaudi, Maciej Hoffman, Giacomo Manzù, Michael Pendry, Maurice Novarina, Regan O'Callaghan, Ana Maria Pacheco, John Piper, Albert Servaes, Henry Shelton and Anna Sikorska.

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Sunday, 28 October 2018

Christian service: transaction or gift?

Here's the sermon that I preached at St John's Seven Kings this morning:

Bob Dylan wrote, in ‘It’s Alright Ma (I’m Only Bleeding)’, that ‘even the President of the United States sometimes must have to stand naked.’ Now, you may well have an understandable aversion to picturing the Donald in the altogether (you might prefer to picture him as Diaper Donald, the blimp that was flown during his visit to the UK), but the point that Dylan makes is that we are all fundamentally the same despite the position, prestige, wealth or power accorded to some.

The Church is, of course, not immune to the temptations of position and prestige. At St Martin-in-the-Fields last week the sermon began with a story about a minor canon in a Cathedral and the position she occupied in the processions that began and ended services. Woe betide her were she to stray from her allotted position. The story came with a wry acknowledgement that, at St Martin’s, we do not always avoid such issues ourselves.

Churches are formed of fallible human beings and so the seeking of and holding onto position and prestige is something that features in every Christian community, while being something which the example and teaching of Jesus’ leads us to try to eschew.

Jesus’ teaching that all who exalt themselves will be humbled, and those who humble themselves will be exalted (Luke 14. 1 - 14) connects with his regular use of the phrase the first shall be last and the last first. He also taught that anyone wishing to be great should be the servant of all and provided a visual example of this in washing the feet of the disciples at the Last Supper. There he said that his disciples were to follow his example of serving others. St Paul notes that Jesus provided the ultimate example of humble service which has no personal benefit, by becoming a human being and, as a human being, becoming obedient to death on a cross.

The connection between all of this teaching about humble service is the call for us to act in ways that are not transactional, but instead are about gift. As human beings, we generally act on the basis of transactions, you scratch my back and I’ll scratch yours. We generally charge for products and services and when we do volunteer often expect to receive some benefit for our contribution, generally in the form of recognition, kudos or thanks.

At the end of the final parable in today’s Gospel, Jesus says you will be blessed if those you invite to meals or banquets cannot repay you. In other words, if you receive no benefit yourself from your invitation, then it is a genuine gift. Among the benefits he thinks we should aim to eschew is that of recognition and kudos. That is why in the Sermon on the Mount he consistently teaches that our giving, our fasting and our prayers should all be in secret so that God alone sees. If we receive the acclaim of others for our giving or serving, then we have already received our reward. Jesus encourages us, as Christians, to go beyond transactions into acts of service that generate no benefit for us in order that they are simply acts of love and generosity because that is how God relates to us.

This is what is called the Gift economy. Lewis Hyde writing about the gift economy says that ‘a gift that cannot be given away ceases to be a gift’ and ‘the spirit of a gift is kept alive by its constant donation’: ‘a cardinal property of the gift: whatever we have been given is supposed to be given away again, not kept. Or, if it is kept, something of similar value should move on in its stead … You may keep your Christmas present, but it ceases to be a gift in the true sense unless you have given something else away.’

Hyde explains that our ego is bound up with transactional exchanges: ‘In the ego-of-one we speak of self-gratification, and whether it's forced or chosen, a virtue or a vice, the mark of self-gratification is its isolation. Reciprocal giving, the ego-of-two, is a little more social. We think mostly of lovers. Each of these circles is exhilarating as it expands, and the little gifts that pass between lovers touch us because each is stepping into a larger circuit. But again, if the exchange goes on and on to the exclusion of others, it soon goes stale.’

Hyde goes on to say that, when giving is reciprocal: ‘The gift moves in a circle, and two people do not make much of a circle. Two points establish a line, but a circle lies in a plane and needs at least three points.’ It is only ‘When the gift moves in a circle [that] its motion is beyond the control of the personal ego, and so each bearer must be a part of the group and each donation is an act of social faith.’

Hyde suggests ‘we think of the gift as a constantly flowing river’ and allow ourselves ‘to become a channel for its current.’ When we try to ‘dam the river’, ‘thinking what counts is ownership and size,’ ‘one of two things will happen: either it will stagnate or it will fill the person up until he bursts.’

This is why Jesus wants us to give in ways that don’t involve our ego being flattered or satisfied. He is prepared to be the dinner party guest from Hell criticising all the other guests in these stories in order to get across the point that true greatness consists of service offered as part of the gift economy where we gain no reward for our actions other than that of God seeing what we have done in secret.

So, when we want everyone to know how much time we've given to the church or how much money we have raised or how many people we have visited, Jesus says to us that we have already received our reward. When we expect others to do things our way because of our many years of service or because of the role we play, Jesus questions our motivations for wanting those things and playing that role. When we hold onto our roles or our titles because of what these things mean to us, Jesus asks us to lay them down for the sake of our own souls.

Jesus, in these stories, acts a little like one of those full body scanners at the airport used to detect objects on a person's body for security screening purposes, without physically removing clothes or making physical contact. He can see through the masks that we hold up to prevent others seeing our true motivations. Before God, we are seen as we truly are, with all our underlying motivations made clear. As Bob Dylan reminds us, ‘even the President of the United States sometimes must have to stand naked.’ His underlying motivations, like those of us all, are fully revealed in the sight of God.

This is why confession is so important as a regular part of our services. We can easily gloss over that part of the service and think to ourselves that we have done nothing that was significantly wrong in the course of the past week. Jesus, however, is calling us to look more deeply at ourselves than we are often willing to do, because he wants us to examine the motivations that underpin the things we do and these are often more selfish or self-centred than we are willing to admit.

Such self-examination, however, is not an act of beating ourselves up and forcing ourselves to find something to confess. Instead, it is a challenge to move beyond our human love of rewards – whether those are to do with money or with approval – and become more godlike in our exchanges by genuinely gifting our contributions in ways which mean we receive no reward.

Jesus says to us, when you give a luncheon or a dinner, do not invite your friends or your brothers or your relatives or rich neighbours, in case they may invite you in return, and you would be repaid. But when you give a banquet, invite those who cannot repay you, for you will be repaid at the resurrection of the righteous.

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Carleen Anderson - Leopards In The Temple.

Friday, 5 August 2016

When one does not die for the other, we are dead already

N.N. Trakakis has a marvellous meditation on humility and anonymity in his excellent article
Found in Translation: on translating Tasos Leivaditis:

"Leivaditis has often been classified as a poet of the margins, even the ‘guardian angel’ of the marginal, the outcasts of society that repeatedly populate his poems: the blind, the forgotten, beggars, anarchists, prostitutes, drunkards, the mentally ill—‘those poor and mad souls who imagined themselves to be birds, ladders or trees’, as he wonderfully put it. Leivaditis helps us see that the marginal is that which cannot be placed under the rule of the conventional and the socially acceptable, and so it resists falsification, dishonesty and dissembling. The real critics of the establishment are therefore those who live precariously on the margins, not those ‘professional sceptics’ (e.g., academic philosophers) who invariably turn out to be the system’s co-conspirators.

Perhaps the greatest value Leivaditis unearths in these marginal characters is their anonymity, a value he wants to ascribe to writing as much as to existence. In a prose poem entitled ‘Anonymity’ and displaying Leivaditis’ characteristic magic realism, anonymity is linked to notions of authenticity and freedom:

No-one waited for him. And he himself knew no-one. Who was he? Where was he going? This was never discovered. The only established fact was that the other day he was found dead on the street and when they went to lift him, as they would have been expected to do, they saw that the dead man—despite the continuing rain—was untouched and his old worn-out clothes were dry. They were naturally taken aback, for they of course could not see the beautiful cover of anonymity…

There is no attempt made by such outsiders to ‘make a name for oneself’, to secure a place in the cherished annals of history, for they recognise that, ‘What else is anonymity but to live in purity and to depart even purer’. This naturally provokes perplexity and fear in those who have compromised with the standards and expectations of society:

At times mother would ask me with tears in her eyes, ‘Why do you like to humble yourself?’ ‘I want to understand, mother’.

It is only the anonymous themselves, Leivaditis writes, who ‘comprehend the mystery of being a nobody’. Anonymity, to be sure, may well arouse in self-defeating fashion curiosity. But the point of anonymity is not to incite in an underhand way the interest of others, but to open up another way of being and writing. Anonymity as a matter of not merely going underground, but as emerging onto new ground.

Together with anonymity, one can detect an insistence in Leivaditis on ‘lightness’—to be become unobtrusive, like light, remaining invisible so as to make it possible for the other to be seen. At work here is something like a Levinasian principle of ‘substitution’, reflected in Leivaditis’ oft-quoted line: ‘And when one does not die for the other, we are dead already’. The life of the writer, on this model, is sacrificial, commanded by a call to give, and so always at a loss and always at sea."

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Corinne Bailey Rae - The Skies Will Break.

Thursday, 1 October 2015

The mystery of humility

“The mystery is this – the more you go beyond yourself, the more you will become your true self; the more you lose yourself in loving and serving others, the more you will find yourself; the more you keep company with those who suffer, the more you will be healed.

This is the knowledge which passes all understanding. This is certain and has been proved experimentally in the life of all the saints.”

Those words were spoken by Richard Chartres, the Bishop of London, at the thanksgiving service for the life of Princess Diana but they could have been written for our gospel reading (Luke 1. 1 - 11) today.

Jesus noted our tendency to put ourselves first, wanting the best places, making our claim to be the most important. He saw it in guests at a wedding. We see it every time we try to board a bus or a tube train. We tend to think that a decrease in politeness and civility is something that applies only to our own day and time but Jesus saw it in his community as well. Vying for position and honour is a consistent human trait in all of us and one of which we need to repent.

Jesus deals with the issue very pragmatically. He says to those wanting the best seats that they are likely to come a cropper because someone more important than them may arrive and then they’ll have the embarrassment of having to stand down. It would be much better for your self esteem, he says, if you were to take the lowest seat and then have the honour of being invited up. So, Jesus pragmatically commends humility to these people by appealing to their self interest.

But the point that he is making is that humility is the only way to true greatness. Richard Chartres explains why we are only truly great when we are truly humble. It is because going beyond ourselves, losing ourselves in service of others is actually the way in which we find ourselves and really come to know ourselves as we really are.

Those who are continually pushing themselves forward, wanting to be first, needing to be honoured are those who do not feel confident in themselves. Their lack of self-confidence and self-knowledge means that they are forever needing the praise of others. Those who know themselves do not need that kind of recognition and so can be in the background quietly serving others because they know themselves and have found out who they truly are.

Much of what we do Jesus says is for payment, even when no money changes hands. We invite friends or relatives or wealthy neighbours knowing that they will pay us back by inviting us back. That is not true humility, Jesus says. True humility does not expect payment or recompense. When we are truly humble then we will invite those who cannot repay us in kind; those who are suffering. Richard Chartres says that, just as we find ourselves by losing ourselves, by keeping company with those who are suffering we ourselves find healing.

To put ourselves first reveals our underlying insecurity and does nothing to fill the need we have for recognition. So many of us live life this way and are profoundly dissatisfied as a result. The mystery is though that those who humble themselves will be made great, those who go beyond themselves will become themselves, those who lose themselves in loving and serving others will find themselves, those who bless and keep company with the suffering are themselves healed.

What Jesus and the Bishop are talking about is profoundly counter-cultural, it goes against the grain of our lives and our society, but it is the way that God designed human life to be and our frantic lives only truly rest when they find their rest in him.

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John Tavener - Song For Athene.

Sunday, 1 December 2013

Come, Lord Jesus, come

The Advent Reflections service at St John's Seven Kings this morning focused on perspectives on Christ's coming. Following a reading of Rowan Williams' 'Advent Calendar', we watched a visual meditation which set my most recent reflection with images by commission4mission artists:   

Coming as Word
Coming as Mary’s “Yes” to Gabriel
Coming as forced journey to Bethlehem
Coming as peace on earth
proclaimed by hymning angels singing
“Glory to God in the highest”

Come, Lord Jesus, come

Coming as nothing
Coming as sperm joins egg
Coming as growth
Coming as foetus
Coming as waters break
Coming down the birth canal
head covered with blood
Coming into light and air
Coming into vulnerability
Coming into poverty
A cold coming

Come, Lord Jesus, come

Coming as flesh
Coming in humility
Coming as servant
Coming in love
Coming through birth
Coming into death
Coming as child
 
Come, Lord Jesus, come

'BC:AD' by U.A. Fanthorpe was read as a reflection on the moment of Christ's coming and this time of reflection was completed with an attempt to sense the challenge and shock of his coming by listening to Jackson Browne's 'The Rebel Jesus', which articulates an understanding of the Christ who came as being at odds with much of our current practice in the Church as his people. 

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Enya - O Come, O Come Emmanuel.

Monday, 3 September 2012

Bill Fay - 'Life Is People'


Bill Fay's Life Is People is an album to treasure produced by a man of real humility with a wonderful back story.

The story is as follows:

"Bill Fay was born in North London, where he still lives. His debut on the underground Decca Nova label, Bill Fay (1970), included spacious big band jazz arrangements by Mike Gibbs, but it was the follow-up, Time Of The Last Persecution (1971), that cemented his reputation — a harrowing, philosophical and painfully honest diagnosis of an unhealthy society and a messed-up planet, that featured the cream of London's fieriest jazz session players such as guitarist Ray Russell. Unable to make ends meet as a musician, Fay wandered through a succession of jobs for years, writing songs privately. His albums were reissued in 1998 after being deleted for 27 years, and when the likes of Jeff Tweedy and David Tibet (Current 93) began singing his praises in the early 2000s, Bill began to come back into view. A third album, recorded piecemeal in the late 70s, was released in 2005 as Tomorrow Tomorrow And Tomorrow, by The Bill Fay Group. And Wilco even convinced the shy singer to join them onstage in London in 2007.

A CD of Bill's early demos and home recordings has also since emerged, but Life Is People is his first properly crafted studio album since 1971. He was motivated by American producer Joshua Henry, a fan who had grown up listening to the Bill Fay albums in his Dad's record collection. Spooling through Bill's home demos, Joshua discovered an incredible trove of material and decided to do something about it. Guitarist Matt Deighton (Oasis, Paul Weller, Mother Earth) assembled a cast of backup musicians to bring out the songs' full potential, Tim Weller (who's played drums for everyone from Will Young to Noel Gallagher and Goldfrapp), and keyboardist Mikey Rowe (High Flying Birds, Stevie Nicks, etc). In addition, Bill is reunited on several tracks with Ray Russell and drummer Alan Rushton, who played on Time Of The Last Persecution."

Fay's humility seems to run throughout this project - in his low-key, almost hestitant delivery, in lyrics such as "The never ending happening / Of what's to be and what has been / Just to be a part of it / Is astonishing to me" ('The Never Ending Happening')) and "I don't ask much, for myself / But for the one's I love" ('Thank You Lord'), and in liner notes which simply express profound gratitude for the support he has received from others in the making of this album.

His songs are simply astonishing - simple and melodic yet with unusual imagery and insights delivered with gravity and grace:

"Ranging from intimate to cosmic, epic but never grandiose, Bill's deeply committed music reminds you of important, eternal truths, and the lessons to be drawn from the natural world, when the materiality and greed threaten to engulf everything.

From the Eden-like hope for a better world in the opening "There Is A Valley" to the street sweeper gazing past the neon lights to the heavens in "City Of Dreams"; from the grand historical sweep of "Big Painter" to the compassionate hopefulness of "The Healing Day"; Bill's perceptive songs strike at the heart of the big issues facing us all today. But they're humble and down to earth too, full of striking images: witness the panoramic "Cosmic Concerto (Life Is People)", with its windblown seeds and grandmas blowing kisses into prams: as rapturous and soul-stirring as any music you'll hear this year."

'Cosmic Concerto (Life Is People)' is a highlight from a collection of stand-out tracks; a celebration of the miracle of ordinary life, the infinite variation in each human face, which stirs his soul. This is music to stir the soul, as Jim O'Rourke has stated "Bill Fay has quietly held his head high above the fray of chaos for years with the beauty of his music and the power of his spirit."

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Bill Fay - Cosmic Concerto (Life Is People).